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Why you should or shouldn't come to
Slowakia, the best beerocracy in the world
Before you read on, I'd just like to say,
for the record, that Slowakia is a great country, the sun rises here in the
morning and there are like houses and mountains and stuff and other countries
are really very, very nearby and they have trains that can take you there.
12 (!)
reasons why you want to come to
Slowakia:
1)
you like girls
with legs up to their armpits
2)
you insist on
having soup at every meal
3)
you enjoy pretending you're a catholic
4)
you like to shock
people by saying things like God loves gay people too,
women and men should have equal rights or
simply by ordering a small glass of beer
5)
you enjoy feeling
like a juicy rabbit during hunting season every time you walk the streets and
almost getting hit by a car every two minutes or so
6)
you like men who
just sit there, say nothing all evening and drink like they're on a boat
overflowing with alcohol and the only way to get rid of it, is to throw it down
their throats
7)
you like slavic
eighties music and dance to it whenever you get the chance
8)
you want to get your
ass kicked in a bar fight
9)
you hate books,
literature and discussions about any topic except sports
10) you like your beer and pizza big and cheap
11) you want to whitewash a few millions
12) you wish to
learn a difficult language that sounds like a dog drueling all over you
Only 8
reasons to stay the fuck out of here:
1)
your idea of a
pleasant night out, is to walk into a bar, strike up a conversation with a
happy looking stranger and feel intellectually stimulated
2)
you like women to
keep their boots on while you're fucking them
3)
you want to
enrich your soul, not put it on a diet
4)
you're not on
steroids and have no talent for street fights
5)
you don't mix
tourism with antropological field studies
6)
you're not
writing a treatise on minority friction
7)
you're not writing
a thesis about the only country in the world who actually paid Nazi-Germany to
deport their Jews (500 Deutsche Mark per head)
8)
There are other
countries in the world you haven't visited yet
30-01-2011 om 17:03
geschreven door Tederdraads 
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