TNA iMPACT Report
April 2nd, 2009
Report by Richard Trionfo and PWInsider.com

We start off tonight’s show with a look back at Samoa Joe’s return to the ring and his desires to bring his ginsu machete into the Impact Zone.

We are live on tape from Universal Studios in Orlando, Florida and your announcers are Don ‘Buy from me if you can, save if you want to’ West and Mike ‘Charity starts at home’ Tenay.

Jeff Jarrett finds his way to the ring and he has his guitar and a mic. Jeff says that last week Kurt Angle and Samoa Joe won the right to be the team captains for Lethal Lockdown. Over the next few weeks, the captains would be able to name their participants to find out who the other three men would be so we could have a series of matches to determine who would get the advantage. Jeff says that Joe has no problem being on the team, but he does not want to be the captain and he did not want to choose the wrestlers on the team. Jeff says that as the founder of TNA, he will announce the captain of Team Not Main Event Mafia. That man is A.J. Styles.

Jeff says that he found the opportunity to name A.J. the captain. Jeff tells A.J. that Samoa Joe is on his team and he will need to pick two more men to face Kurt Angle’s team. A.J. says that he is honored, but he has to decline the offer because he says that he is not qualified to be team captain. A.J. says that he has let Jeff down. A.J. points out that Jeff founded this company seven years ago and he put it on a bunch of independent wrestlers who he believed in. They were a bunch of nobodies. Jeff took a chance on him, Samoa Joe, Christopher Daniels, Eric Young, and James Storm because they are the originals. A.J. says that he will be on the team, but he thinks that the man who believed in them and a bunch of independent wrestlers should be the captain. That man should be Jeff Jarrett . . . TNA Founder. A.J. says that they will be led to victory by Jeff and they will not let him down.

Scott Steiner comes to the ring and he has something to say. He tells Jeff to listen to A.J. because he is telling the truth. Steiner points out that when TNA was started, it was filled with a bunch of nobodies and wannabes. Other than the Main Event Mafia, the roster is still full of nobodies and wannabes. Steiner says that he came out here as Jeff’s friend of over twenty years. Scott talks about going down the highway trying to make a name for themselves. Scott says that they are the same. He says that Jeff and the Main Event Mafia are the same. Scott points out that Mick Foley went crazy last week. There is no way that Jeff can trust the future of TNA with the young punks. Scott tells Jeff that he is just like him and the Mafia. Scott says that he also met Jeff’s wife twenty years ago. Scott says that he respected and loved her. He says that she told him to help Jeff with his girls. Scott says that he was there when Jeff’s children were born and helped while they were growing up. Scott asks Jeff who would he trust if something was wrong with the girls.

A.J. tells Jeff that there is a roster of wrestlers he can trust, and it does not include the Main Event Mafia. A.J. tells Jeff to have faith with the originals. A.J. tells Jeff to do what is right. A.J. suggests that he wrestle Steiner in the first match of the ‘Who Gets the Advantage Challenge’. Steiner tells A.J. that if he wants a match, he has a match.

We go to the Main Event Dressing Room. Jeremy wants to know about the offer for Jarrett to join the Main Event Mafia. Angle says that everything changed when Mick Foley hit Sting with the chair and now it is time for the plan to work. Angle says that Foley and Jarrett had a plan to bring Sting to their side at Destination X, but Mick Foley went into business for himself. Angle says that Sting is back in the Mafia and Jarrett is on an island of his own. Angle says that Steiner went out to tell Jarrett that he had a spot in the Main Event Mafia. Angle says that Sting has always been with the group. Angle says that he was a bit paranoid. Angle says that Sting saved him and he is going to make a public apology. Angle tells Nash to get some money from Jenna. Booker lets out a forceful RESPECT as we go to commercial.

We are back and it is time for Sheik Abdul Bashir to talk. He is with Lauren. He has fifteen seconds. Bashir says that TNA management’s problem is much bigger than the Middle Eastern Nightmare. It starts tonight and continues through Lockdown, United they Stand, Divided the USA falls.

Match Number One: Jay Lethal, Consequences Creed, and LAX versus Sheik Abdul Bashir, Kiyoshi, Yujiro, and Naito
Homicide and Bashir start things off and Bashir punches Homicide. Homicide with an overhead belly-to-belly throw. Hernandez is tagged in and they double team Bashir and Hernandez with a body block for a near fall. Hernandez gets Bashir on his shoulders and Lethal is tagged in and he hits a double sledge for a near fall. Lethal punches Bashir in the corner but Bashir with an Irish whip and he runs into an elbow. Lethal is pulled off the turnbuckles by Bashir and then Yujiro is tagged in. Him and Naito double team Lethal and hit a double hip toss followed by a drop kick and leg drop. Kiyoshi is tagged in and he hits a chop from the top turnbuckle to Lethal for a near fall. Kiyoshi with a kick to the head of Lethal but Lethal fights back but Kiyoshi stops Lethal. Lethal out of a belly-to-back suplex and Creed is tagged in. Creed punches Kiyoshi and then he hits a cross body. No Limit pull Creed out of the ring. Lethal and Homicide with baseball slides followed by a tope con hilo by Homicide and a Suicide dive by Lethal. Hernandez comes off the apron and he lands on everyone on the floor.

Creed and Bashir are in the ring and Bashir with a rake of the eyes as Creed tries for a TKO. Creed with a kick to the knee followed by a DDT for the three count.
Winners: Sheik Abdul Bashir, Kiyoshi, Yujiro, and Naito

Jeff Jarrett and Mick Foley are in the Founder’s Lounge and Jeremy says that he is in shock at the offer for Jeff Jarrett to join the Main Event Mafia. Mick says that it only matters if they have fun. Jarrett says that he cannot believe that he would find the day that he regretted allowing Mick Foley invest in TNA. Jeff says that he sees the point of what Steiner had to stay. Jeff says that they were so close to taking down the Main Event Mafia. Then four days later, he tries to take off Sting’s head with a chair. Mick says that he had a chair in his hand and he almost took off Sting’s head. Mick says that they need the Mafia. Jeff wonders if Mick is someone who can lead the company. Mick says that he is going to make a big decision tonight and that he is someone who can lead the company. We go to commercial.

We are back and Jeremy Borash is with Team 3D and Jim Cornette. Devon asks if Cornette is going to live up to their bargain. Cornette says that if Team 3D kept the Mafia away from the ring, they will give it back to them.

Main Event Mafia security enters and they blame Cornette for getting Team 3D involved in their business. They want Team 3D in the ring. Ray says that is very funny. Ray wants to know who they are.

Velvet Sky and Angelina Love come to the announce table and he calls the fans a bunch of perverted dogs. She says that none of them will ever have a chance with them. Angelina tells Tenay that if they want to plug the show, Taylor Wilde is getting her hair cut.

We go to commercial.

We are back and Mike Tenay is with Mick Foley. Mike asks about the plan to possibly bring Sting away from the Main Event Mafia. Then Mike brings up the chair shot when Sting was trying to protect Mick in their match. Mick calls Sting arrogant and condescending. Mick says that something snapped and when it was done, he felt a freedom and enjoyment in his action. Mike points out that Foley praised Sting for his career achievements. Mick says that he might have given Sting too much credit. Mick says that he will drop the best elbow on Sting. Mike wants Foley to look him in the eye that he was not looking to be the champion six months ago. Mick says that six months ago, he was settling and now things have changed and he says ‘why not’.

Time for Dr. Stevie and Abyss. Abyss talks about how him and Lauren will not have fourteen children. Abyss says that he does not use weapons any more and he says that he is better. Stevie wonders why Abyss missed the last two sessions. Abyss says that he will be in the Doomsday Chamber of Blood Match against Matt Morgan at Lockdown where you need to make your opponent bleed before trying to pin him. Stevie closes the door and then he slaps and punches Abyss while Abyss yelps like a dog being disciplined.

We go to commercial.

We are back with a Rough Cut of Team 3D talking about being hardcore. He says that it is not about weapons, it is about giving everything in the ring. Ray talks about the injuries and concussions that he has suffered in the ring. Devon talks about what has to be done in a steel cage match.

James Storm and Robert Roode are at the announce table with Don and Mike and they say they are here to watch.

Match Number Two: Rocco and Sal versus Team 3D
Sal and Rocco attack Devon and Ray before the match starts. Rocco punches Ray and kicks him in the back of the neck. Sal is tagged in and he kicks Ray. Sal chokes Ray in the ropes. Ray punches back but Sal rakes the eyes. Rocco tags in and he hits a splash on Ray and Ray winces in pain. Rocco punches Ray followed by a hard Irish whip. Rocco kicks Ray in the head. Ray punches back but Rocco bites Ray’s forehead. Sal tags in and he punches Ray. Ray with an uranage to Sal and both men are down. Devon is tagged in and he knocks Rocco down. Devon with a back elbow to Sal followed by a swinging neck breaker. Rocco with a splash onto his partner when Devon moves. Devon with a flying shoulder to Rocco. Devon with a clothesline to Sal but Rocco breaks up the cover. Rocco with a slam to Devon and Rocco goes to the apron and then he goes up top. Devon stops Rocco and they hit a double press slam and then they hit a neck breaker belly-to-back suplex combination to Sal for the three count.
Winners: Team 3D

After the match, Main Event Mafia Security attack Team 3D with a chair. Roode and Storm enter the ring and they attack Main Event Mafia security. Roode and Storm give Team 3D their tag title belts.

Jeremy Borash is walking with Mick Foley and he tells Mick to reconsider and make up with Jarrett. Mick calls Jarrett a party pooper. They walk by Samoa Joe. Joe says that he wants the Mafia and he tells Foley that he can make it happen. Foley tells Joe to take the knife from Borash’s throat and he will see what he can do.

We go to commercial.

We are back with a Moments Ago Moment of James Storm and Robert Roode being nice to Team 3D.

We go to Lauren with Roode and Storm and she asks them why they did what they did. Roode says that people took notice of their interview because they saw a serious side. At Lockdown, in Philadelphia, they want Team 3D at their best. No injuries, no excuses. Until the pay per view, they have Team 3D’s back. Storm says that they have sacrificed everything to prove that they are the best tag team. They want Team 3D to bring their crazy fans to Philadelphia and don’t care if the fans come into the cage. Storm says that he wants to see everyone’s faces when they are announced the New Japan and TNA Tag Champions.

Kurt Angle comes to the ring and he is flanked by Booker T, Kevin Nash, and Sharmell. Angle tells Sting that with all due respect, he would like him to come out because he has something to say.

Sting obliges and comes out. Angle says that it takes a pretty big man to come out and admit that he is wrong. He says that he questioned Sting’s loyalty and honesty. He even spit in Sting’s face. Angle tells Sting that if he lived his life, he would know why Angle is paranoid. Angle says that he is going to humble himself and apologize.

Sting wants to know if Kurt is kidding. After everything that he has done over the last month if a simple handshake will work Kurt. Sting tells Kurt that he questioned everything about him. Angle tells Kurt that it was about one thing when they shook hands in Las Vegas. It was about respect Kurt. Sting tells Kurt that they have talked about the spoiled brats in the back, but Sting tells Kurt that he is the biggest brat in TNA. Sting tells Kurt that Kurt’s ego has gone too far.

Angle tells Sting that he is right about everything. Angle says that he cannot change, but he can apologize. Angle says that he is sorry.

Nash takes the mic and he asks Steve that a man apologizes in front of all of these people and now Steve is going to walk away. Nash asks Steve about turning the other cheek. Sting tells Nash not to go there, but Nash tells Steve that they are already there. Nash says that the fans want Sting to walk away. Nash tells Steve that there are a few people in the business he respects and Steve is one of them. Nash begs Steve to help because he is Angle’s only help.

Mick Foley comes out and he is in the rafters. He says that it looks like the band is back together. Foley apologizes for not being in the ring because he was being reacquainted with a friend and that friend is a barbed wire baseball bat. Foley says that he wants to make sure that Sting is ready for their match. Foley says that he has booked Sting in a match tonight. Sting will wrestle Samoa Joe tonight.

We go to commercial.

We are back and Dr. Stevie is with the Governor who has returned as Daffney. She talks about what she has done while she was away from the ring. Then she talks about the call from Roxxi and Taylor about being the Governor. It was just a joke, but then they took out the scissors and started hacking. The feelings she tried to suppress came back.

We see footage of Madison Rayne cutting Daffney’s hair.

Match Number Three: Madison Rayne with Sheer Madness (Velvet Sky and Angelina Love) versus Taylor Wilde
Wilde with a waist lock but Rayne with a standing switch. They lock up and Rayne with a side head lock but Wilde with a hammer lock and arm drag take down. Wilde with a drop kick and then Rayne goes outside. Wilde is kept at bay by Love and Sky while the referee is distracted by Rayne. They pull Wilde off the apron and then they roll her back in to allow Rayne to hit a hot shot for a near fall. Wilde with a drop kick for a near fall. Rayne with a kick to the midsection and then a kick to the head. Rayne with a front face lock followed by knees to the head and swinging neck breaker for a near fall. Wilde with a wristlock Northern Lights suplex for a near fall. Rayne sends Wilde into the turnbuckles followed by an Irish whip but Rayne misses a charge. Wilde with a rollup for the three count.
Winner: Taylor Wilde

After the match, Love and Sky attack Wilde and they hold Wilde for her haircut appointment. Wilde escapes the ring and runs to the back. Love and Sky yell at Madison for letting Wilde escape. They tell Rayne to get Wilde. We go to commercial.

We are back and Madison Rayne and Taylor Wilde are in the back and they have found Taylor in the shower area. Taylor is in a fetching white robe while Velvet and Angelina hold Taylor for Madison to cut her hair. Security enter the shower area and try to stop them.

We run through the card for Lockdown.

Now it is time for Scott Steiner and A.J. Styles to start the walk to the ring since their match is next.

We go to commercial.

We are back and Lauren is with Jenna and she asks Jenna about Kurt Angle’s comments about her. Kevin Nash stops by and they talk about leaving. Jenna says that she wants to hear what Kurt said about her and Nash cuts off Lauren and Nash says that Kurt said nice things about her. Lauren tries to say something but for a change, she is speechless.

Match Number Four: Scott Steiner versus A.J. Styles in a Lethal Lockdown Who Gets the Advantage Best of Three Challenge A-Go-Go
They lock up and Steiner with a side head lock and shoulder tackle. Steiner sends Styles into the turnbuckle and he chops Styles. Steiner with an Irish whip but Styles with a reverse atomic drop and clothesline followed by punches to Steiner. Styles with a punch to Steiner in the corner. The ref tells Styles to stop punching Steiner. Steiner with a rake of the eyes. Steiner with a slam followed by a boot to the back. Steiner with a chop and Styles avoids a slam but Steiner with a low kick when the referee looked and turned away just after the kick happened. We go to commercial.

We are back and Steiner punches Styles. Steiner with an Irish whip but he charges into a boot and Steiner goes down. Styles and Steiner exchange punches but Styles with an enzuigiri for a near fall. Styles sets for the Styles Clash but Steiner with a back body drop. Styles with a Northern Lights suplex for a near fall. Steiner with a rake of the eyes and a punch. Styles tries for a rana but Steiner blocks it into a power bomb for a near fall. Steiner with a chop to Styles but A.J. chops back. Styles with a back breaker and then A.J. goes to the apron for a springboard forearm but the referee gets in the way and the referee goes down.

Kurt Angle comes to the ring and he gives the chair to Steiner. Steiner misses Styles and A.J. hits the Pele kick but the referee is still out. Jarrett attacks Angle and Styles grabs the chair. The referee warns Styles and Jarrett grabs the chair. The referee tells Jarrett to get off the apron and Angle pulls him off. Steiner with a Flatline onto the chair for the three count.
Winner: Scott Steiner

Jeremy Borash is in the back with Sting and Borash asks Sting about his match at Lockdown and the match that Foley made for Sting against the Governor of the Nation of Violence. Sting says that Joe is not dealing with a full deck. Sting tells Mick that he is a survivor and that next week, Mick will pay. We go to commercial.

Match Number Five: Sting versus Samoa Joe in a Joe starts to get revenge on the Main Event Mafia for what they did to him even though Sting didn’t do anything Match
Joe with a kick to Sting followed by punches as he enters the ring. Joe chokes Sting but Sting kicks back followed by chops and punches. Joe with kicks to Sting’s leg. Joe with kicks to the chest but Sting blocks a kick and Sting applies the Scorpion Death Lock. Sting with a clothesline followed by an Irish whip and clothesline. Sting tries for the Stinger Splash and Joe with an STO. Joe slams Sting’s head into the turnbuckles and then he puts Sting on the top turnbuckle and punches him as he sets up for the musclebuster. The referee gets in Joe’s way and Joe throws him down and the referee calls for the bell.

Another referee comes into the ring and Joe with a knee to the nard area. Joe hits a muscle buster on Sting and then he puts Sting in the choke. Booker T comes to the ring and he connects with knees and then he tries for the axe kick but Joe moves and Joe hits a Pele kick. Joe with forearms to Booker and then Joe goes to the floor to get a steel chair. Joe brings the chair into the ring and Sharmell tries to be a human shield. Joe thinks about what to do and he drops the chair and leaves the ring. Joe grabs Sharmell and pulls her out of the ring and Joe takes Sharmell out of the Impact Zone.

We go to credits.