I realized it ain't worth it. I'd rather die and forever stay dead than to live again. I'd rather die and forever stay dead than to live again in this disrupted world. It ain't worth the insanity, and it ain't worth the pain, and it ain't worth the stress, and it ain't worth the problems. And I won't have to deal with it ever again. Because I said: Fuck everything! And I won't deal with it ever again. It ain't worth it.

I realized I realized my childhood dreams and it's worthless to this world. I realized I realized my childhood dreams and my work is worthless to this world. I also realized my fear of dying is decreasing, and besides the fact that a part of that is probably just a strange illusion, I think it's due to the fact that I realized my childhood dreams. Which means that although the realization of my childhood dreams, which is my work, is worthless to this world, it still causes my fear of dying to decrease. Which means that even though my work is worthless to this world, it's still a victory to me. I'd like to end this text with an English translation of number three on this blog. It's the main reason why I was called to do most of the things that I did in my life. It's called: Once upon a time there was a graveyard... 

Heavenly Father, without faith, my heart would be as poor as the street. To me personally, faith is a real recourse. And if there is one thing on this cursed earth that should not be asked of me, it is to remain silent. No, I will not keep to myself the fact that these people have belittled me until my heart was as poor as the street, and then declared me schizophrenic. These people are for the most part subject to the evil one, and subject to the bondage of sin. The 'lights' of these people are the extensions of idols and are to be rejected, as are the lies they use. No, I will not keep to myself that these people are false, insensitive, that they mock others, that they yield to the devil's reason, that their behaviors and words are foolish, that they succumb to collective sleep, that they repel the righteous, that they are withered and rotten, and that they do everything that goes against the creativity and flexibility of the mind. Modesty is foreign to them. Immorality, lowness, superficial wit, and violence, on the other hand, they know like no other. They have turned away from God, reject the needy and the weak, and believe themselves to be the norm at the same time! In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen!