How are you doing? Me? I'm a lot of stuff but I'm trying not to complain, realizing so many people are living far worse & they're free, not confined inside a cage like I am. Yet, I'm not happy.
On Sep 7 my brother & a good friend visited me. It was a pleasure to get out of this cage, to see people concerned about me. This doesn't happen often. My friend's son came with him. This young man is 14 years old. Unit officials allow children under 18 to come in without having to be on my visiting list. I was impressed by this young man. He would like to join the police when he grows up. This is unusual for young people these days.
My brother said my father was in hospital and that he almost died as he was given the wrong medication. Had my father passed away I think it wouldn't have affected me at all. I don't hold anything for him. This was something I thought about for a while. I realize my feelings are the same statement my father has expressed to me for years. What am I supposed to feel for someone who stands by & watches me suffer & does nothing for his son? This is unnatural for a father. This sickness was passed down to me. This is the sad part.
My brother & sister suffer from bipolarity, both have two different personalities. They're given medication for their disorders. They only have this because of the problems passed down by my parents, they didn't suffer from this growing up. I was affected differently, I never wanted to be anything like my father, I wanted to achieve all my father couldn't be & everything he wasn't. I guess I was successful doing this. This stuff runs through my thoughts as I struggle to save my life with so little support coming from my family.
I share this with you to help you identify my situation & how I view things, as well as what I'm fighting to overcome, while I battle with life behind these walls.

Things have become more difficult because prison officials aren't acknowledging their policies, they're making the rules out to be whatever they want them to be - this has become a distraction. Just think about what has been happening to me: the false cases, being demoted, having my property taken away, being punished for something I didn't do, games being played with my mail... don't you think this would affect anyone?
Death row prisoners are now no longer allowed to have pencil sharpeners! Yes, you read that correctly. Now what is this all about? Prison officials are slowly taking away prisoners' rights & privileges. Major McMullen put out an IOC stating As of  9/15/2011 all & any pencil sharpeners on 12 Bld. will be turned in to the  property officer. If you are in possession of this item, disciplinary action will be inforced. Can you believe this? Do you recall prison officials passing out shaving razors to us, prisoners, in the shower? I think this is why pencil sharpeners are being taken away. How much sense does it make to deny prisoners shaving razors, then give us a razor blade inside all pencil sharpeners? These are just my thoughts, I don't know for sure why they were taken away. Like everything else, prison officials say, pencil sharpeners will be in the picket for prisoners whenever one is needed, prisoners only have to give the officer their IDcard. The first night this started, the pencil sharpener wouldn't sharpen not one pencil, the guard had to go on to another pod to get their pencil sharpeners!
A guy down the run shared that the mailroom was holding his mail to his attorney over a week, can you believe this? This guy came off death watch, the way the story goes he sent his attorney a letter, a week later his lawyer came to see him, so he asked if he had received his letter and he hadn't. They requested to speak with the warden & complain, the mailroom people still had this guy's letter, it was given to him then.
I have a grievance I have to appeal. I was written a case but was never taken to kangaroo court but I was given a punishment. My reply stated Disciplinary case 20110356119 has been reviewed. No procedural or due process errors were identified. It appears that there was sufficient evidence to support a guilty verdict. The punishment imposed was within established guidelines. Therefore, there is no valid reason to warrant overturning this case.
Now this is what the "Disciplinary Rules & Procedures for Offenders" states: An offender shall not be given any punishment without a hearing; a disciplinary hearing must be conducted before imposing cell restriction or loss of privileges.
These people are violating their policy every time & they know exactly what they're doing, guys are talking about law suits which will take years to address while the problems continue.
Did I share with you about unit officials removing $100 from all prisoers'accounts to pay medical treatment? If not, now you know. On Sep 1, 2011 officials began removing the money from the account of inmates who request treatment. It's an all out attack upon prisoners.
This is a depressive place filled with all kind of confusion, chronic dilemmas & madness I couldn't begin to explain. Thinking about all of this would keep anybody upst, frustrated & angry!

30-09-2011, 00:00 geschreven door Sunshine