a thousand raindrops comming down

falling on my head,

warm soft and

oohh so tender.

wather running down my fase

over my eyes and my cheeks.

rapped in a dress of wather

created by mother nature.

i feel the strength of it

cleaning my heart and my soul

taking all negativity

down to the earth.

where it is turned

in to positive energy.

so all menkind can enjoy.

 

suddenly i wake up

i was only in the shower.

felt just great.

 

enjoy it

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

beeing ill is the worst thing in life.

no outside

only inside 

and a visible ilusion of what you have to mis.

 

cant take it anymore

so open the window

the cold air surrounding me instantly

making my skin freez.

 

the sound of the wind in the trees.

tok, tok, a stick falling out of the tree

hitting him a few times

before touching the ground.

 

the grass , not completely green

but with the finest icecristals

knispering under the feet of a

small tiny rabit.

 

a shadow pasing bye

of a bird

kraa kraaa,

its a crow caling out to world

 

all of this

makes me wanna go out

go out and dance

in the warmth

of the soft rays of the sun

wi kan ik voor je zijn,

wat kan ik voor je doen?

 

wees ontvankelijk als de aarde

wees aanstekelijk als het vuur

wees verkwikkend als het water

wees zachtmoedig als de wind

 

wie kan ik voor je zijn,

 wat kan ik voor je doen?

 

wees een zon die ijs doet smelten

wees een bloem die vreugde geeft

wees de lucht die alles zuivert

wees een meer dat rust verschaft

 

wie kan ik voor je zijn,

wat kan ik voor je doen?

 

wees een weg voor hen die dwalen

wees een brug die samen brengt

wees een huis voor hen die vluchten

wees een haard die warmte schenkt

 

wie kan ik voor je zijn ,

wat kan ik voor je doen?

 

wees een mens die blijft geloven

wees een mens die opnieuw begint

wees een mens die nog kan hopen

een mens die zondermeer bemind.

walking trough the mists,

of an early morning in the forest.

 

nothing to hear,

but my own footsteps

and sounds of nature.

 

a bird saying hello,

some foxes,

talking about last night.

and looking for a desert.

 

suddenly i feel company,

look around,

but there's nothing to see.

the mist is to thick

 

the sun,

doing everything to break trough

gets a reward for her labor.

 

she made a hole,

in the clouds,

and starts shining down on me.

 

nature is waking up.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

light a candle in the dark,

let the light into your hart.

dont make a fist,

carres that what was hard.

 

light a candle in the dark,

bring peace there where you go.

spread your arms and listen

to the peoples in the flow.

 

light a candle in the dark,

honer what is fragile and small.

be patient tilll the end,

let love be where you are.

 

 

in love and light.

every day,

i grow bigger and bether

in every way

 

i ame

the love, the light, and the wisdom

that you are looking for.

look at me

and see the unit,

see the light of love

in yourself!

 

lots of love , peace and understanding

for this time of the year!

for every time of the year!

for always*

first snow came down.

tikkeling my nose,

and freezing my ears.

turning everithing white.

 

the little footsteps of a bird,

coming closer to peoples,

to be able to drink.

 

the sun standing low in the sky,

doing the best she can,

 to give some heat,

to menkind and nature.

 

at night

when i look outside,

i wanna go out, bare foot,

and dance in the light of the moon.

 

thank you mother naure for this beatifull time of the year. 

yesterday i went to the park with a frend.

there where some kids there, they had such a good time!

they started making a circle.

putted a candle in the middle, and started dansing and singing.

they sang a song for our mother, goddes, the  moon and our father, god ,the earth.

they sang about autumn, the wind, the trees...

they were all dressed as witches, and blew some serpentine in the circle.

afterwards they took the ends of the papers and made a web,

over the circle.

conected ass they were they started dansing again.

it was beautiful to see.

it as so pure , and natural.

 

i loved it.

 

happy elfke

have been discovering myself lately.

i found out that i have some problems with love!

i always thought i did'nt give enough love , or the wrong love.

seems that that was not the problem.

i do give the right love and enough love and i do everything right,

but i think i do it wrong , and thats the reason for my failure.

the biggest problem is , i cant accept that someone realy loves me to!

and therefor i do not reseve the love,

i close myself or start creating problems so the person who loves me cant get the chance to realy show his love.

you probably think, why do you do this?

if i would know i wouldn't do it.

i think it is because of all i already experienced in the past, i think i'me frightened to get hurt again if i love someone.

therefor i wont let myself be loved or wont let myself love someone.

 

now that i know all this i can start working on it!

and i will.

i ame a nice and gentle girl who deserves to love and to be loved.

so why wouldn't i .

 

 

with love happy elfke

everuthing is os much more fun if you can share it!

that's why i now share my appartment with someone new in my life!

yes indeed you read it good! i got someone to live with me!

it is a man, he is 13 jears old and is oooohhh so nice to me.

you'll think, 13???

yeah it is a cat!

he loves it here, he is so sweet , his name is skunk!

a black and white cat! i'me so happy to have him.

and he needed a home so!

the more we share , the more we get!

if you share with love, (not in fear!), you'll see more luck komes to you!

you'll reseve more love, you'll get a great feeling and everithing goes bether.

whats fun if you can not share? not much i think.

you know, it even frightens me to think that there might be a time that i won't be able to share!

but ass fear is the worst guide in ones life , i do not listen to it.

i do listen to it but i transform it in love and trust!

more peoples should do so!

 

in love and light

with a sharing hart!

this morning i realized that it had been a long time since i wrote something for the last.

i almost got angry with myself but desided that it had been best like this.

i needed the time to adjust to my new home and several new sytuations.

i also needed some rest! after all the hard work!

and actualy i still need some rest, but not that much anymore.

 

i like my new appartment and i love the city life.

but when my mum came to tell me she and her boyfriend have bought a house in walonie,

i could not get a breath!

it was like: aaaaaaaahhhhh now there's no way back!

i paniced for a sec! but didn't show it!

i told her i was so happy for her, and hoped it would work out fine!

now well it did. two days later she had bought it officialy!

by that time i had had time to get used to the idee

Well i supose it has to be like that and everything turns out right the way it should.

 

in love and light

 

happy elfke

i'me now realy livving in my new appartment.

it is greart here, and i also have a pc, so you wont have to mis me anymore!

in case you did.

i' me bussy now to put the pictures i already have , on, my space, but it might take a while!

first have to install all the programs to put them on my pc, before i can put them on my space.

why do i tell you all this, you probbably know it all!

doesn't matther, i 'me bussy!

i want to do so many things at the same time!

and we can only do one at the time!

just a message to let you all know i me back in spaceland!

and i me happy about it!

love you all!

i moved to my appartment yesterday!!!

yep sooner then i expected, but i was soooo happy!

in two hours the peoples who helped me did the job.

last night was my first night over there, it was a little srange but it went well.

i got some more good news too.

someone i realy like gave me a computer, so i caled instantly to the internet company to make an appointment to install internet!

this means i won't be off internet that long afterall.

only have to wait till the pc arives! but that wont be long anymore.

seems like everithing goes like it should , and even bether!

i'me so happy. i realy ame!

this is a short message but soon there will be more!

dont pannic, i wont run away.

love ya all!

dady,

i haered a song yesterday!

while listening i realized why i feld so bad the last days.

no one will understand me , cause of all i have been trough.

but still i mis you, and dady i wanna say!

i forgive you! i forgive you for all you have done to me , and others!

i wich you could be near me, and see how proud i ame about everything i achived, i wich i could see how

proud you are about the same things!

we may have had bad times , but it would have been different if you where still here!

 

dady , i miss you!!!

 

with love elfke

i went to my appartment with a happy feeling!!!

last day painting, the rest of the week i can cool down!!!

nope!! not true!

my mum forgot to tell me we where out of white paint! so i couldn't do a thing yesterday!

damn!!!

i hate it, and all peoples who wanted to help me couted till yesterday, so the rest i will have to do on my own!

does'nt mather!

i got time!

and now i can also start making plans for the moving ! it will be this weekend!

so lets hope i got a van, and some peoples to help by that time!

i do not want my mum to help with it! cause i'me shure we will fight then!

and the last thing i want is to go out of the house with a fight!

i want to look back on it as a fun and joyfull time!

hope you all enjoyed this, and i will soon put some pictures on my space!

hope its all over very soon!

jiieeeeeee!!!

yesterday was a terible day, i was overstressed, and had a mager argue with my mom!

i asked her nicely to leave but she made it worse and started breaking me down, everything i had desided about MY appartment, the colours, the floor, the way i cleaned it up, everything i had done wrong!

i told her that it is MY appaertment and asked her to leave .

she didn't want  to, i said her that if she would'nt leave in half an hour she could do the rest on her own, and i would leave! that she could go and live there, and make everything like she wants it!

 

ooooohhhh stupid me! why in the first place did i let her help! i could have known it would end like this!

finaly after four times saying that i would leave she left!

so i could go on with painting and cleaning!

but now the badroom is done, the toilet is complete(thanx to erik!).

the meditationroom is done! and only the entrence and the coridor have to be done , that should be finished today!

the old floor in the meditationroom is out, the old floor in the coridor is out and all that has to happen is waiting for the new floor!

i hope they come soon to put him in!

i cant wait to move! i will be so glad to have my own place!!!

the spots in the badroom where now problem, they dissapeared like snow for the sun!

the tiles are beatifil, it looks all like new!!!!!

today is the final day of hard working!

from tomorow on, i can start thinking of moving!

and making arangements for it!

lets hope it is all done by the end of next week!

i was painting the badroom, but ass i started it went wrong!

i was doing it with a roler, it should be easyer!

but when i came over a spot where i already had been, the paint came of!!!

so i could see the damn bleu paint again!

I desided to put a verry small cote of paint over the complete wall.

and today i will put on a second cote , i hope the paint wont come of any more!

the tiles are beautifull. i like the result! they were bleu, old bleu! jakie!!!

i putted on a primer so the paint would stik to it!

now i painted them in white and they look like new!

 

soon i will put some pictures on my space here!

but i do not have a digi cam from myself , and have to wait till all the pictures are taken to put them on a cd , so i can put them on here!

you'll all have to wait a while to see the result , and the work.

i desided to make something special of my toilet, it wont stay completely dark, i will do something with it , but don't yet know what!

i'll let you know when i have an idee.

or if anyone has an idee, just let me know!