I'm not sure how to put it, but I'll try a bit.

There are different things of school which I wanne achieve but can't do it alone. Everything seems 100 times harder when I'm looking at it like I'm doing now. I wanne achieve what them teachers want from me, but I'm not sure if I can. I'm not sure if I'm as capable of doing the things the teachers ask me to do.

I'm trying to make apointments with people and the only thing I learn is that I get left alone at those apointments. School, friends, work everything. I'm not sure if it's even worth trying all the time. Putting effort in those people, maybe I shouldn't.

People say I'm thinking to much, I should stop thinking that much. But I'm not sure how, is there an off button on your head? Can anyone tell me?! 

Every night again and again, I'm trying to sleep but I'm getting nightmare. Every night again 2 or 3 times. Everynight I scream myself awake and If I'd close my eyes everything is still there. Everynight I see people disapearing in my eyes. I see people dieing, people leaving. Sometimes I'm not sure what reality is or what isn't. 

I'm drawing again, perhaps a tattoo if I'd had the money for it. If I'd get a tattoo it will be a bird flying to sky. A Beautiful animal which can escape reality, and see everthing from above. They can enjoy both sides, walking and flying. Singing happily with all those other birds, way up high in the trees. 

I don't know what to wright anymore sorry peeps, I'll try tomorrow again xs