Yesterday I cried. Somehow I can't seem to all let it go. My heart wants him back, my mind knows I shouldn't. I shouldn't love him anymore, I shouldn't daydream about him anymore, I shouldn't want him to call me anymore. Even though my heart feels torned apart, yet I only remember the beautiful things from the past four years. Laying in bed all day, surrender to lust, passion and love. Two bodies nearly melting together as one. Being kissed and held, like if no one else would ever do. Waiting for the train, and dancing on the platform. No one else around in our minds. Just the two of us, dancing on clouds, in sunbeams. Only our hearts beating and only our eyes looking to each other, filled with love and friendship. Wandering down the streets, hand in hand, never to let go. Laughing like no one ever did. And only us who understand the humour of it. Acting crazy, making strange faces and laughing loud about it. No fear to show each other who we are. We respect each other in every way. Taking strolls in the woods, gazing in each others eyes, thinking about the wonderful night before.
Could it be that all of this is gone? All for nothing else but sadness and grief? I feel frozen, cynical, hard and tormented.
Oh please, send me an angel to take away the pain. Send me an angel to save my soul from grief. Seduce me, angel of the dark...
