As if I have no will of my own but am in constant battle with my body

and I'm losing.

It wants to live.

I want to die.

We can't both have our way.

So the self destruction and violence creeps into the rift between me and my body and I'm going out of my mind with fear.

Starvation is incredibly frightening when it finally sets in with a vengeance. 

And when it did, I was surprised, I hadn't meant this, I try to say: wait, not this.

And then it sucks me under and drowns me.

10-04-2009 om 00:00 geschreven door Tigana